Vamanos Pest

Lately I have been getting up at record early times so I can go out an ride.  The Morning Glory west end ride begins at 5:40am.  But today I drove out to Kitchener to ride with a pal at 7:30am.  We took and awesome route from Kitchener out to Cambridge, through Roseville, New Dundee and whatever the hell else you wanna put in there.  I have so many good friends because of cycling, it's one of  the best things about riding/racing ......all the awesome people you get friends with. We banged off a decent paced 60km on some pretty good rollers on roads with little-to-no cars.  With only one motorcyclist illustrating his mental deficiencies.

Then , earlier this evening an idea hit me like a dance club sucker punch.  My son had been awake all day, so with this instinct I have recently developed I was able to surmise that he will be tired and go to bed early.  So , why don't I put the last nail in the coffin and make him walk up to the Liquor store with me?   I grab a few Chimay's............then I see this new weird looking bottle in the shape of a Buddha.  It's some Chinese Beer called Lucky Buddha.  I bet they don't call it that in China, so it's probably marketed for Westerners who also like to think they understand the concept of karma.  My plan is to do a side by side taste test almost just like I did several weeks ago with Duvel Moortgat and Molson Canadian.  (Spoiler Alert!!!!!!! Canadian got slaughtered, because it's a crappy watery tasting , bland, no hoppy, no anything but a bit of head Beer).

Rucky Buddha.  It's capped, not twist off.  Score one point.  Cool bottle.  Score second point.  I opt to pour it into a tall DeKoninck glass as the smell and colour reminded me a bit of that beer.  It had a small head after being poured and it smelled ok.  Unlike Grolsh which often smells like total skunk ass.  But after trying it thought to myself , I know what I hate...and I don't hate this.  Which isn't to say I would buy it ever again, but I won't bash the crap out of it like 100% of the beers ''brewed" at the big 3 breweries.
It's smell also reminded me of whatever I used to drink when I was 17---  Superior lager was often the beer of choice as it was dirt cheap.  I wonder if that stuff is still around?  Anyways, this Buddha beer smelled good and didn't taste like crap but it was about 5% lighter than what I normally enjoy.  So it was a pretty average beer for the commoners who enjoy products like Wonder bread, Trek Bicyles, BBQ sauce instead of hot sauce,   Kung Fu instead of BJJ, Blackberry phones, Cold Play and U2 and crappy average shitte like that.   Lucky Buddha scores a whopping 5/10 on the Trev scale of awesome beer quality.  I recommend this beer to slightly heavy but lovely bastards like Rob Stoeser.  It would go well with a extra large pizza with a lot of cheese and a bottle of sweet Frank's Extra hot.

About 45 seconds after I got up and decided not to drink any more Buddha beer I reached for a delicious and nutritious Chimay (it took me 4 tries to spell nutritious correctly just then) .  What can I say about one of the finest Trappist beers that hasn't already been said by mouth's with brains?  At 7% I would guess those monks consider this a possible trippel.  I think.  I think a dubbel is reserved more for the 6% ballpark and below, but whatever.  I once heard an insane man say that Chimay Red was a bit too chewey.  He sounded insane and should have been medicated.  I agree that Chimay white cap is superior to Premiere but only just.
Everyone should drink Chimay , and also later drive to  a Molson or Labatt brewery and whip their  giant trappist bottles into the parking lot so they will know you don't like, and won't put up with crappy beers .  I  mean, we're not talking about cheese slices here, where even the crappy no name brand slices are still pretty good.  Trappist beer is for people with a pouch who also shun the mainstream.

In the cursed earth 
Where mutants dwell 
There is no law 
Just a living hell 

Prestige Worldwide II

When I was about 11 yrs old I  lived in North York, which is on the north end of Toronto.  In the summer we all used to play at this ravine, there was a small river and trails going through the trees .  It was great fun.  I often tried to coerce my Mom into letting me camp down there with my friends.  She never gave in.  Another great part about the ravine was this storm drain outlet into the creek. It was a huge tunnel that frequently poured  rain water into the creek that eventually drained into Lake Ontario.  We were able to get inside this huge sewer tunnel if the water was low.  There was a steel cage over the entrance but with a little work we could always crawl beneath it.  It wasn't gross and infested with rats as I had always imagined.  It was dark but not dark enough to scare us.  We could tunnel our way up for a while until we hit the  ladders that would take us up to the Man-Holes on the street above.

One time (my last time) we went down into the tunnels with some older kids.  They were all just sitting around near the entrance , too cool  I suppose to go all the way in.  Maybe they had done it too many times...I don't know.  So I crawl in, and I find this huge baseball sized piece of tarmac.  It's gotta be 6 lbs.  I guess I just wanted to see how far I could hurl it down the tunnel.  I wound up and fucking chucked it like I really meant it. I remember  the screaming.  It seemed like the screams began the exact moment the rock left my my hand.  I had hit the oldest, biggest and toughest of the boys right in the temple with my overhand asphalt curveball.  He cried like a much younger kid I thought.........but in his defense , there was a shitload of blood.  Blood. Blood . Blood. His blood.  Everywhere.  I also remember thinking if this kid doesn't come to kill me in the next few days, his parents will.  After a week of worry, I sort of forgot about it.  I hadn't heard he died, or  that he was looking for me.  So I took that as great news.  I haven't hit anyone with rocks ever since.

Yesterday I was on Facebook chatting with some dude from Belgium.  He informs that there is now an 8th Trappistine bier.  I was like 'cut the crap'..........for realsies?   There is now an 8th Trappist monestary/brewery .  Although it's not in Belgium, like those posers at De Koningshoeven in the Netherlands. (i'm just screwing around) but this one is in Austria.  I can't speak to the deliciousness of the beer but I do know one thing.  There is not a crappy Trappist beer.  Chimay is creamy good .  Orval, even tastier.  Westmalle Trippel being the best beer ever to pass my lips, but I can't wait to taste this .

I think me, Jimmi and Tom are going to have to pay another visit to the beer bistro soon.

this weekend in pictures..........

Vic and Hanka  living it up again. In Germany.

Victor again, with Eric Zabel

                                                             

Not nearly as tasty as you would think

fairly tasty

This meal gave me the strength I needed to pop the cork out of that Chimay

This was actually La Trappe in a Hoegaarden glass, and I can safely wear that shirt.  My last name was O'Doyle 5 or 6 generations ago.

the view from Kevin's awesome Queen and Spadina loft, before we went out for beer in Little italy

I think this is a Corn snake.  On the way up to Hockley Valley.  Alone.  No friends would join me.  MB, DK.....

Taste the silence

Trappist Beer is beer brewed by Trappist Monks, or at least under the direct supervision of Trappist Monks.  There are only 7 Trappist monasteries in the world, 6 in Belgium and 1 in The Netherlands.  All 7 carry the AUTHENTIC TRAPPIST PRODUCT logo and should be considered a world class beer with strict guidelines and standards and a rich history.

I now have tried all 7 of these lovely beverages.  La Trappe being the last one.  If I were Sam  Jackson and this blog were Pulp Fiction I would be saying 'ymmmm, this is a tasty beverage Vincent!!!"   Alas,  I am neither Samuel Jackson nor a beer reviewer.  Far from it.  Hell, I'm not even a blogger.  Well, maybe a shitty blogger.....I guess that's still a blogger.   But anyways, this La Trappe bier is really good.  A couple of the Trappist beers are a little heavy.  Not that they aren't tasty....especially after 2 or 3, but they sit thick and heavy kind of like how Molson Export used to when I was 17.  12 of those bastards and you were hammered , but also too full to move.

This La Trappe tripel is similar to Chimay premiere but really the big difference is that there is almost no aftertaste.  It may be a bit smoother going down but less creamy, but for some reason (could be that I just rode 120 kms solo)  I think I like it better than Chimay.  Maybe less than Orval though, and although I love beer as much as the next guy (who really friggin' loves beer), I always lack the hyperbole to describe something in terms understandable by those who haven't known me for 20-25+ yrs.   In summation I gots to say that La Trappe is one of the better Trappist beers at least to a North American palette,  and if you ever see it at the Liquor store you should grab as many as you can afford.    I can only describe La Trappe as a  winning and tasty amalgamation of Meuse River water, the sweat of 1000 monks, with the carbonation of  a Pop Shoppe veteran all bottled really fancy-like in a corked 750 ml jug.  Me likey!!!!  The only thing I don't understand is their slogan found on the reverse label of the bottle that reads "taste the silence"......What the ?!?!?   Maybe 'taste the sound of getting kicked out of the bar'..........or 'taste the punch in the face'.................or 'taste the pillow as you hit it face first'..................man, this beer is 8%, and although that may be a light beer by  Belgian Trappist standards I'm not detecting any  silence.

The other thing I don't get about the La Trappe Tripel...........and it's why some labels have a big T on them and some have a Big D.   I am cool with those 2 initials but why 2 different ones?  I must look into this.

I rode today from Dixie and Bloor St in Mississauga to Rattlesnake point in Milton and then rode the hills around there for an hour , (I only did the Rattlesnake climb twice though) before heading home.  I kept the pace high and stayed in the drops a lot.  Light winds from the north/west, and largely overcast skies.  Although it was very humid and cloudy the sunshine did fall on me.  A good little ride.   I pretended may last name was Blazek and hammered out a fast pace.


Ice Cube will swarm on any motherf#cker in a blue uniform.